Memoirs of a Jobber

I just want to confirm what you may already know in your heart of hearts, the podcast may effectively be dead. I’ll be upfront and say this is all Long’s fault. After getting the “fire and brimstone” treatment on another podcast (about the 58 min mark, but listen to the whole thing since they’re quality people),  he left the country. Not sure when he’ll be back, but we can’t podcast without him. Or the studio.  On top of that, me and Dan aren’t on speaking terms and Al found employment. So yeah, it’s pretty much a wrap for the podcast.

For the record: I was against the podcast from the beginning and I’m the last one to turn off the lights. It sucks.

But as the only member of the Jobber Cartel with a semblance of a heart, I do have a parting gift to the faithful listeners and readers as a token for my appreciation. Here are some tidbits from my memoirs. Hope you get more enjoyment from them than I did experiencing them.

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MEMOIRS OF A JOBBER (draft)

Al snapped again. A little tame compared to previous snaps, but memorable nevertheless. I think he set a new record for “tantrum to segment” ratio this recording session though. Sure, everyone politely defers to the self-dubbed “Mr. The Whole Fucking Show” but that’s only to prevent a repeat of last time. Eff. Seriously, his healthy sense of self-esteem is becoming a problem. We can’t even record a whole segment without him cutting the mic and shouting someone down.

Soon-to-be victim: “Hey, I’m going to have to disagree.”

Al: “That’s cool, I guess you love being wrong. You know who else loves being wrong? Otakus with body pillows and pedophiles. Are you serious, are you SERIOUSLY disagreeing with me? You know who makes this show? Me. You know who makes this podcast work? Me. Who do you think you are? The co-host? Get the fuck out of here with that garbage. You talk when spoken to. Do you know what my name is?”

Newly minted victim: “Bu-bu-”

Al: “Mr. The Whole Fucking Show. You know why? Because I’m The Whole Fucking Show. I hope you wake up to boos because that’s what you deserve for such a fucking shit life.”

I didn’t make up any of that.

The warm reception of the past couple of episodes might be getting to his head. He is the host and all, most energetic guy here, but the self-daps and fist into the air when he elicits a laugh is annoying. Whatever. Another mediocre episode in the can.

-Alvin